ONCE UPON AN APHORISM

by Ralph Lombard

Humpty-Trumpty sat on a wall…

“Pardon me,” said the stinky old fart.

Hear a wealth-made man lies.

One gets the impression they’d prefer a press “corpse”.

“Look!” said the blind and deaf elephant, “There’s nothing to see hear!”

Clean-up your own messages.

The only way to have your cake and eat it too is to steal someone else’s.

They remain conceited because they actually can’t stand themselves.

The most obvious need of any child is apparent.

Mother Goose got down!

If I didn’t have a brain I wouldn’t mind.

To add self-sufficiency and self-reliance, count on your own fingers.

What do you call a frightened Australian psychoanalyst? A Freudy-cat.

What do you call a French female lawyer? Le gal.

Who’s the world’s greatest inventor? Pat Pending.

When I die I want to be remembered posthumorously.

Chess develops mental patience.

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